All They Can Say...

As I started a new job over 6 years ago, I was taught a valuable lesson about sales...and about life. When I was hesitant to make a sales call, Hugh would always reassure me by saying: 'All they can say is no.' Of course there are some people who go above and beyond your typical 'no' but, for the most part, that is the worst thing you can hear.

Along those same lines is the idea that, 'you'll never know until you try.' I've been thinking about those two phrases and how they cover so many different aspects in our lives.

My brother wants to get a dog for his apartment/house however, he lives in a place where no pets are allowed. He asked me if I thought it would be a waste of time for him to even ask his landlord if he could have the dog. Using the same words that I had heard so many years before, and so many times since, I said, 'all she can say is no.'

There have been times when I have pulled up to a potential client's business and before going in I think of all of the reasons that they would NOT be interested and then I hear the distant echo urging me to at least give it a shot.

As I said before, this principle not only applies to sales but to many other aspects of life. If you want something...ask for it. Let the person you're asking tell you no. 'If you don't at least try, then you'll never know.'

I remember the disappointment that inevitably came every time I asked if I could have a sleepover and I was told no. Or the times I would ask to be taken bowling and met with a similar response. BUT, I never stopped asking. Why? Because sometimes the answer was yes.

I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to ask a girl out but before giving her the chance to say no, I did it for her. With that said, some of the best relationships I've had (both romantic and otherwise) have been because I put myself out there...I have wanted to know, so I tried.

It has been a valuable lesson to learn and here are a few ways you can apply it to your lives:

If you feel like you deserve a promotion or a raise, ask for it.
If you have a crush that you want to go on a date with, ask.
If you need something from someone, ask for it.
If you want to borrow a cup of sugar from a neighbor, ask for it.
If you would like to get some advice, ask for it.
If you want help, ask for it.
...this list could go on and on but you get the picture.

What's the worst that can happen?...you'll hear someone tell you no, then again, they may just say yes. Either way, you'll never know until you try. Good luck!

The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow...

I have always loved sunsets. Up until my senior year they were one of my favorite aspects of nature. Sunsets, like snowflakes and fingerprints, are each unique. The sun never sets the same way twice. The light it leaves behind as it disappears on the distant horizon changes each and every day.

As the sunset on graduation night, I couldn't help but look back on all of the wonderful memories I had made up until that point. It was hard to say goodbye to those wonderful years filled with late night runs to 7-11 for Orange Bang, awkward school dances, high school crushes, etc. That night after all of the festivities were over we ended up underneath the bleachers on the high school football field. It was the perfect place to end the night, and an even better place to start the day.

Most of my friends had fallen asleep but I had stayed awake to see the sun rise slowly above the Wasatch Mountains and fill the western half of the valley with warmth and light. As it got higher and higher the light made it's way to the east carrying with it all of the hope and anticipation of 'the first day of the rest of my life'.

Since that day, sunrises have gained a slight advantage over sunsets. The contrast in their symbolism is as different as night and day and they are each the more beautiful because of it.

The following song articulates the idea better than I can:

"I think over again my small adventures, my fears,
Those small ones that seemed so big.
For all the vital things I had to get and to reach.
And yet there is only one great thing,
The only thing.
To live to see the great day that dawns.
And the light that fills the world."
(Inuit Song)

As you see the sun set today and think of the days events, look to the sun rise tomorrow and all of the possibilities it carries with it.

The English author G.K. Chesterton once said:

"Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed."

We are often painfully aware of the 'dragons' in our lives. They do not hide in far away caves. They are not waiting for us to approach them. We do not need to be reminded of their fiery flames...we've been burned before.

What we do need is to know that those dragons can be slain regardless of their size or strength.

We need to know that we possess the power to overcome the trials and tribulations that we face on a daily basis.

We need to know that we are not alone. We have fellow dragon-slayers in our midst. Those who struggle with problems of their own, and perhaps more importantly, those who will join our fight and help us slay our dragons. We should also be willing to wield the sword of defense for those who are struggling to support its weight on their own.

That is one type of fairy tale...of course there are others. They have a similar theme. By changing just a few of Chesterton's words we can see another example:

"Fairy tales do not tell us that love exists. We know that loves exists. Fairy tales tell us that we can find that love."

We could explore a variety of different versions but the idea is the same.

“Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live the world they’ve been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It’s an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It’s a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.”* - John C. Maxwell

*i may have already used that quote before, but i like it so you get to read it again.

Friday of Firsts...

In addition to learning how to fly fish, I also learned how to make candy canes. Rather, I should say that I learned how candy canes are made. There is something about traditions that make the holidays that much better. This was a tradition that I was allowed to be a part of. Apparently, the tradition goes back quite a few generations and continues in the modest kitchen of an elderly couple from Layton.

I rang the doorbell and waited patiently on the porch for someone to open the door. The warmth of their home was the perfect contrast to crisp night air outside. They had just finished rolling/forming the candy canes from the first batch...black licorice. If you know me, you know I love black licorice. I sampled a few of the small broken pieces that had cooled just enough to be edible.

I was introduced to everyone as we waited for the second batch to be prepared. For those of you like me, who have never made a candy cane, I'll give you the readers digest version. The batter (I guess that's what you would call it) is brought to a boil on the stove. After it has reached the perfect temperature it his poured out onto a cold marble stone (the size and shape of a cutting board), as it cools it is folded over itself until it is 'cold' enough to be handled. The quotations marks are there because it is not really cold. In fact, it is still hot enough that if you were to hold it in your hands they would be burned quite easily. The flavor is added and then it is then placed on a hook where it is pulled, twisted, and then pulled again. It is to allow air to work it's way into the batter and 'cool' it quickly and effectively.

The stripes are then added to batter and it is pulled and rolled into smaller rolls and each is then individually shaped into candy canes. Apparently, that is the ONLY shape they are supposed to be made into. I was warned against making any other shapes...I deviated from that counsel and made a heart out of the root beer flavored batter. If you know me, you know I love root beer.

The third time is the charm. By the third time everyone had been taught the part they would play and it went off without a hitch. The third and final flavor...cinnamon. If you know me, you know I love cinnamon.

After the candy canes were formed and bagged, we were each given a treat bag to take home. After we had finished making the candy canes we sat and listened as they told stories of how they met, their courtship, and their lives in general. I love old people. It made me miss my own grandparents and the memories I shared with them. Those memories left a better taste than black licorice, root beer or cinnamon ever could. If you know me, you know I love my grandparents.

Fly Fishing...

For some 'black Friday' began as early as 10pm on Thursday night. For me, it began a little after 9 am. I got off to a late start and skipped breakfast. Stink wanted me at his house at 10am...I told him no. I knew myself well enough to know that I would not be there that early, so I reluctantly committed to 11am. By 10:45 I was sitting on his living room couch. He was going to take me fly fishing for the first time.

We left his house around 11:30 and I made him stop at Wendy's before going to the river. Bacon Cheeseburger in hand, we drove up the dusty dirt road and pulled up alongside a couple of other cars parked on the side of a gated-pasture. We sat in the bed of the truck getting ready to walk out to the river. We couldn't have asked for better weather. Once we had put on our waders and assembled our fishing poles we set out for the water.

I had debated whether or not to bring my camera with me. After realizing that we would be walking through the river and that I didn't not bring my waterproof bag, I decided to leave it locked up in the truck. I imagine we looked like the 2009 version of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn as we walked through the open field and alongside the river. We found a safe spot to cross and when we reached the other side we began 'rigging up.' Aaron (aka Stink) taught me the basics of tying of hooks and the proper way to cast.

By that time the weather, the kind that was 'better than we could have asked for' had changed. It was cold but not unbearable. We stood thigh-high in the water and continued to cast and mend the lines in hopes of catching fish. That never happened. I'm not sure if it was the pessimist in me or the realist, but I had no intention of catching any fish anyway. The good news is, I was not disappointed. Instead, I just enjoyed myself.

For me, fly fishing was never about catching the fish. Sure, I paid $26 for my 365 day license but that was just to make it legal. Instead, it was about learning something new. It was about being outside and being able to clear my mind. It was about appreciating nature, seeing bald eagles and deer in their natural environment. It was about being inconsequential in comparison to the grandeur around me. And, it was about spending time with a friend and creating great memories.